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A letter to my daughters on Mother’s Day

This Mother’s Day, Time Magazine featured letters from Celebrity Moms to their daughters. This inspired me to write my own letter to my daughters.

To my girls….My inspiration

Did you know you girls are my inspiration? I wanted to take a few moments this Mother’s Day to let you know how much you both mean to me. I’m so proud to be your mom. When I was a teenager, like most kids my age I said “I’m not having kids!” Not because I didn’t like kids, but because for some reason I thought having kids meant life was over and I wouldn’t be able to do things that made me happy. How selfish was that and boy was I wrong. Without trying you changed my life. A huge part of my life began when I became your mom. I had a new view of life and was inspired like never before to follow my dreams and to make sure that I was the best example for you.

There are a few things I want you to know. It’s so important to me that you both know who I am and what I stand for and believe in…to know my heart. No other title I could ever have would be more important than being a wife and your mother. Whether we are having impromptu dance parties, taking our morning rides to school every morning or when you curl up with me in bed. Every day I spend with you is truly a gift. I know you will grow older and won’t think I’m cool anymore or be unhappy with the tough decisions I make on your behalf, but remember I’m your mom and I love you more than life itself.

I love you girls…love mom.

My hope for US on Mother’s Day

 

mothersdayNo one likes Sad Mommy, Mean Mommy, Scary Mommy, Distant Mommy, Withdrawn Mommy, Distracted Mommy, Overwhelmed Mommy, Angry Mommy, Resentful Mommy, and Anxious Mommy…Including YOU!

These are real emotions mothers like you and I feel everyday. It doesn’t matter if you’re a brand new mom, a professional mom of multiples, a mom of toddlers (or stair steps), a mom of teenagers, an empty nester mom, married mom, single mom or a teenage mom who got received her cape slightly early. All of us at some point in our parenting have felt or are feeling these same emotions. Many times we keep everything inside never sharing it with our spouses, family members, friends…. anyone. Why? I’m a Mom, I’m supposed to be strong, don’t let them see you sweat, do everything…. and look cute doing it! NOT!

If I can be very transparent, there are some days even I don’t feel so great, I’m still learning to be the best Mother I can be. I have my moments of frustration and impatience, hold my children to unfair standards of perfection, and some days I totally miss the mark.

“The two most powerful words when we’re in the struggle; me too” -Brene Brown

You are not alone in your feelings! Mother’s everywhere are waking up every morning putting on their Super Mom cape and attempting to juggle way more than we can handle. Since the beginning of time women have been known to be the picture of strength. We’ve all seen or used this quote “A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it’s in hot water”-Eleanor Roosevelt

As I began reading this quote and thinking about the attributes of a tea bag, at our healthiest state we resemble a tea bag…resilient, giving, and productive. When we’re at a low mental state it’s difficult to be everything to everyone. Most of us play dominant and very active roles both in and out of our households and have a hard time saying no to everyone and yes to our needs and ourselves.

Here are five attributes of a tea bag I feel we as moms should seek to adapt as the beginning to saying goodbye to mean, stressed, depressed, and tired mommy.

1.  A tea bag is Transparent.

As a mom, being transparent is hard. We like to wear our “everything is ok face” 24/7 365 days a year. We don’t want to appear weak or if we aren’t worthy to wear our supermom cape. It’s alright to be transparent, to say I need help, I can’t answer that right now, I need a moment, a break, and 5 minutes alone in the bathroom.

2. A tea bag is Filled with leaves.

What kind of tea can an empty tea bag produce? Exactly, nothing. What can an empty Mom produce? Exactly, nothing. What am I being filled with? Am I fulfilling my purpose? As a mom when you pour out to your family, allow your family to pour back into you. It is very important to find ways to be filled whether it’s through a personal bible study, reading a book, prayer, or girl talk with a friend…you’ll be surprised how much better you feel.

3. A tea bag Preserves.

The tea bag is strong has the ability to protect its leaves against even the hottest water to produce the best tea.  Mothers have perfected taking care of everyone beside herself. If we want to be around to watch our children grow and to see their children and children’s children we have to preserve our health, both mentally and physically.

4. A tea bag is Strong, but only within its limits.

A tea bag is strong but not strong enough to withstand being run over by a car. Know your limitations! It’s ok if you can’t wash, clean up, cook, read, work, fly a plane, and heal the sick all in one day!! No one expects you too and if they do…check your circle!

5. A tea bag Alone can’t produce tea.

It would be nice if alone a tea bag could make you a bomb cup of tea after a long day. Wouldn’t that be nice! The tea bag needs the bag, the string, the tea, YOU, hot water, a nice cup, sugar, lemon, honey…you get the point. You alone are great, but what make us better is the people we surround ourselves with! Appreciate those people and allow them to make you better.

My hope for us on Mother’s Day is to be Happy Mommy, Patient Mommy, Fulfilled Mommy, Attentive Mommy, Present Mommy, Balanced Mommy, Loving Mommy, Understanding Mommy, Supportive Mommy, Relaxed Mommy, and Ambitious Mommy…. everybody likes her…. including YOU!

Happy Mother’s Day!

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Sucker for Mothers

Happy Monday! Hope that you all had a great weekend. I did! In fact I had a very busy one….but I can say I learned something valuable from each day.With all that was going this weekend, I truly learned that I am a “Sucker for Mothers”. Last night as I was reflecting on the weekend and my Mother’s Day, and I realized that I am a great mother because I am surrounded by other great mothers. I received some really great Mother’s Day cards this weekend and this year I really “READ” them and took the words to heart, and I know that I wouldn’t be able to read those words about myself, if it wasn’t for my mother, my grandmother’s , aunts, cousins, friends, and YOU (yeah You). Some people may say “well my Mother wasn’t such a good Mother, but I am determined to be a great one”. We didn’t only learn from things our mothers verbally taught us and good things we observed them doing, but we also learned from their silence, imperfections, and mistakes to be Great Mothers….Haute Mommi’s.

On Thursday, I attended the 2012 Good City Gala. Good City is an organization that provides resources to non-profit entrepreneurs that seek to make a difference in communities that desperately need it. My takeaway from this event is that there is so much more that each of us can do to change a community. This is why One Haute Mommi is so important to me because I know if I can empower a mother than fathers, children, and households can be enhanced and pushed to operate on a greater scale. Check out their site at goodcitychicago.org

Friday, I had the opportunity to attend a concert with my besties, I love these women, and they are crazy just like me! They are a great group of women and mothers, and every time we get together we laugh a whole lot and learn so much from each other! I also learned that FREE isn’t always good (insider, lol).

Saturday, I attended a Mother’s & Daughters Brunch at Hickory Hills Country Club with my Mom and Morgan. This place brought back so many great memories because this is where my husband and I took our vows, it looked as beautiful as I remember four years ago when we viewed the property for the first time. The brunch was a great time for bonding between Mother’s and Daughters, many Daughters shared words of Thanksgiving for their Mom’s and Mom’s shared “Word’s of Wisdom” for their Daughters.

Finally! Happy Mother’s Day! Sunday my family and I continued our family tradition of participating in the Y-Me Breast Cancer Walk. We walked 3 miles aside of 30,000 + people walking for breast cancer survivors, themselves, and family members. My leg is still sore from all that walking! That evening we spent invaluable time with our family.(Learn more about Y-Me at y-me.org)

How was your Mother’s Day?